Cheesemeister Talks To Her Neighbor

Cheesemeister interviewed her next door neighbor about a strange woman who has been seen roaming around in the trailer park while Cheesey was at work.

A Possible Ending For "Gone With The Captists"

Here is a possible ending being considered for "Gone With The Captists."

An Alternative Ending For "Kill Bill"

There are many ways a story can end, just like in life.

Love In The Netherworld

I think that might be Nervous Norvis alone with Lyanne Sakks. This was one of the oddest love scenes I have seen in a movie lately. The movie is eXistenZ.

More Pets For Cheesemeister

Cheesemeister loves animals. She has taken in the ones that Dr. Schitz has been doing DNA experiments on in his lab.

Cheesemeister Has A Bad Day

Actually this is Radha Mitchell in the movie Silent Hill which I was watching and it reminded me of the Cheesemeister talking about what a bad day she had and how she felt. The writing on the movie is because I am testing out a DVD ripper program.

Crackajack's Screen Test

Crackajack tries out for the film version of Gone With the Captists

Here's Metal Tinkerbell

Watch out when she's in the crowd at a concert!

A Friend Is...

Is Icy thinking of doing something to the cat?

Dr. Doggy Schitz Examines Dusty Doggy

Dusty Doggy has been feeling poorly, so Dr. Schitz sent his pet assistant, Dr. Doggy Schitz to check him out. The good doggy doctor said he will be fine, but he still needs the surgery to have his halitosis removed. And he needs to go to sissor-hands and have the hair cut from around his butt hole. Whew!

Freda Fussbudget Screws Up Again

The test results for determining the father of Lammy's baby, Lambkin, were ruled invalid. Freda Fussbudget, the lab technician for Dr. Schitz, got the DNA samples all mixed up. Everything was contaminated, so new samples must be drawn from the possible fathers and the whole process must start again. Dr. Schitz said he hopes to have the new results before the end of the year, but Lammy had so many lovers, it may be the end of next year before he gets all the new samples from them.

In a previous incident, Freda Fussbudget got the charts switched for two patients in a room being prepared for surgery. Dusty Doggy was given the sex change operation meant for Murry Magdalene, and Murry got the halitosis removal surgery intended for Dusty Doggy.

This Is Not An Apology

by Woody, the Curmudgeon Clairvoyant

Well, fvyge! I shore didn't know who that Weirsdo woman was! When she said "I could have told you that..." I thought she meant that she was married to the Bush fella. Wives always say that! Besides, I couldn't hear what she wrote much well 'cause my Apple Crystal iBall had a dead battery. Just couldn't connect to the psychic Internet right then. But being a full fledged pledged Curmudgeon, we are sworn never to apologize. So there, you old battle ax! Next time you make a comment, make sure I can understand what you mean. Hope you get choked on a fuzz ball!

Mrs. Weirsdo's Reading

by Woody, Curmudgeon Clairvoyant

The Creativity Card came up for Mrs. Weirsdo, the woman with a Phd. in Weirdology. She has a peculiar talent for breathing life into inanimate things like dolls and stuffed animals. But like Frankenstein created a monster that eventually destroyed him, her own loving little creatures will smoother her with hairballs of love.

Yes, beware. When you breathe life into a stuffed animal, be careful what you inhale.

Curmudgeon's Club Offers Free Tarot Readings

Sample Reading: You are very stupid, a real dope and dumb ass! You can't read reports and believe every lie told to you. You also surround yourself with other dummies who give stupid advice. A positive point is that you are a very good liar even though you have difficulty putting together a simple sentence.

Woody the Clairvoyant of the Curmudgeon's Club has agreed to give a free sample simple one-card Tarot reading for just 666 Quatloos to cover shipping and handling. Make your request in the comment column and answer three simple questions:
1) Are you alive?
2) Are you human?
3) Are you really you?

Warning: Curmudgeons are very direct and candid and usually very insulting. Do not apply if you are a crybaby and can't take the verbal beating of truth. This product may contain bull shit.

It may take several years to see your reading in a future post, depending on the volume of traffic on the freeway to the office.