This Is Not An Apology

by Woody, the Curmudgeon Clairvoyant

Well, fvyge! I shore didn't know who that Weirsdo woman was! When she said "I could have told you that..." I thought she meant that she was married to the Bush fella. Wives always say that! Besides, I couldn't hear what she wrote much well 'cause my Apple Crystal iBall had a dead battery. Just couldn't connect to the psychic Internet right then. But being a full fledged pledged Curmudgeon, we are sworn never to apologize. So there, you old battle ax! Next time you make a comment, make sure I can understand what you mean. Hope you get choked on a fuzz ball!

Curmudgeon's Club Offers Free Tarot Readings

Sample Reading: You are very stupid, a real dope and dumb ass! You can't read reports and believe every lie told to you. You also surround yourself with other dummies who give stupid advice. A positive point is that you are a very good liar even though you have difficulty putting together a simple sentence.

Woody the Clairvoyant of the Curmudgeon's Club has agreed to give a free sample simple one-card Tarot reading for just 666 Quatloos to cover shipping and handling. Make your request in the comment column and answer three simple questions:
1) Are you alive?
2) Are you human?
3) Are you really you?

Warning: Curmudgeons are very direct and candid and usually very insulting. Do not apply if you are a crybaby and can't take the verbal beating of truth. This product may contain bull shit.

It may take several years to see your reading in a future post, depending on the volume of traffic on the freeway to the office.